Thursday, August 4, 2011

Alexander McQueen craziness

This morning I finally went and saw the Alexander McQueen show at the MET. It was, as I had hoped, amazingly beautiful and totally over the top and exotic. I knew he was talented but this show blew me out of the water. He was truly an artist and I only wish the show were staying longer so I could go again.

This was amazing
Oh check these out
I heart plaid.

Friday, July 29, 2011

Hide your chips!

Paul is a snacker. He munches on food all day. I find it humorous to watch him work from home. He will be on a call, on mute, and graze through the kitchen over and over. Maybe I should put him out to pasture. He could be like those goats you see on the sides of hillsides eating the grass.

Thursday, July 28, 2011

Iheart myself

I have a goal in mind and I will figure it out. I want my own line of stuff....aka goods. I designed this for my huband. Its my first actual manufactured item. I hope for more. Saying that I heart myself sounds cocky, but it's something I need to remind myself each day. Loving yourself first helps you love everything around you. Furthermore it opens you up to so much.

If only

If only I was as popular as my dog.

I cannot walk a half block without someone smiling at Rufus and a full walk around a block will always get a comment. However today I had a lady gasp when she saw him. At first I was like "Um okay", then she says to me "Your dog makes me so happy I want to cry". Then she did! No kidding she didn't but it was the most unique statement I have heard yet.

My other favorite is to hear the Puerto Ricans ask "Escoose me. Wha kind of dawg is tha?". Apparently in PR they do not have Standard Poodle.

Rufus conquers all!

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Old man take a look at my life

Whenever I hear a song by Neil Young or Hanks Williams Jr.,  I am immediately taken to the front seat of my dads pick up truck as he drove me from my Mom's house in Apple Valley up to his place in Big Bear every weekend when I was a kid. These songs and the memories they hold are so powerful that I can see every detail of the drive, feel every bump in the road and the colors of those memories burn so bright it is intoxicating.

I guess boys idolize their dads, even gay boys with a dad that at the time was less than desirable to the outside world. My dad Henry "Hank" Godwin is a gentle giant these days. Aged by a hard life of sun, drugs, social stigmas and hard labor. We share the same blue eyes and every time I look in the mirror I cannot help but see him staring back at me. Will I be like him at his age? Probably, hopefully not. It's not that I don't love him, I do but a life like his is not something I would think would agree with me.

Anyway it really is interesting how sounds or smells and tastes can imprint your life so deeply. Music has always ruled my memories. I cannot wait for my soundtrack to come out, iTunes will be all over that.

Sunday, July 24, 2011

Thank you

To my four followers. So kind!

Okay maybe I am slightly more into alcohol then I thought

The "House Bar"

So today we went back to Astor Place Wine to pick up this really good white blend from Oregon called "Evolution". While there we met our new bestie Tania. Tania helped me pick out some good gin, some more wine all white from CA, OR, France and Spain. Its so warm out and white wine on weekends and some weeknights and maybe at breakfast seems to keep the sanity.




This should last two weeks. Kidding, just one.
Secret wine drawer. Don't tell Paul!

Saturday, July 23, 2011

We're not alcoholics, we're just gay

Paul and I went to Astor Place Wines and stocked up on white wines. Also some tequila, one bottle for margarita's and the other to infuse with strawberry and jalapeno, spicy! A bottle of Hangar One Mandarin Blossom and some orange bitters. After we consume all that (which will probably be by next week) I will go buy some Gin. I have oddly been into it lately. Not gin and tonic's but gin cocktails. I had an especially good one two nights ago at a local restaurant - It was gin with muddled cucumber, St. Germain and splash of pure cranberry juice. It was so good I had two.

Lastly - because of this heat I have been really into fruit and wine. We opened this gawd awful bottle of cheap wine. Instead of tossing it I added cut peaches and a one plum along with a handful of strawberries. Also two ounces of Cointreau. Turned out really good!.

Saturday

The past few days have been so good. Though its hot as fuck out my spirits are higher than they have been in a while. Maybe I am sweating out all the negative.

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

GYM

I have never been one to fully love working out. Even as a kid I didn't partake in sports or even show much interest in sweating much. However I realize that it is very important to stay active. Not just because every gay in the is gosh darn city has like 4% body fat but its good for the mind.

So I am going to go at least 5 times a week now. This isn't exactly news but writing it and sharing it publicly may help in keeping the pressure on.

As of today I am 203 lbs. Who knows what my body fat % is, probably like 73.1.

Fun Project

Three coats of magnetic paint followed by some chalkboard paint and here we go. I hope Paul loves it.

Sunny Day, Sunny Outlook

Okay so yesterday was a heavy posting on my part. I woke up today in a hot apartment. It was quiet for Paul was on a train to Boston early this morning and my dog won't dare move when its above 85 out. Luckily though the rain has taken off and left us with a hot hot summer day.

I am trying to figure out things to do when I am stuck in the house on (literally) hellish days. Crazy that I would even have to ask this question seeing I am in a city with unlimited possibilities. A friend of mine is doing someone everyday, something new that is. Maybe I should take her lead and try that. I do need to explore beyond my neighborhood so when/if people come I can be like "OMG we totally have to go check this place out because they have the best blah blah blah". It's always fun when you can visit someone and they know their city/town/village. Surprising though how many people cannot find their way out of a paper bag. I have a friend who "just moved" from MI to CA like 7 years ago and still doesn't know his way around. Yes BD I am talking about you. XO.

So what should I do? If any of you are in NYC or have been here and feel I need to check out (insert place/person/object here) let me know. I will go and take a picture and let you know what I thought.

Monday, July 18, 2011

Cliché sadness

It's raining right now. One of those crazy East Coast rains that starts out of no where and by the time you can even think "where is the nearest Duane Reade is to buy that damn umbrella I knew I should have brought because "they" said it was supposed to rain but damn that thing is too bulky and I have an image to uphold" you are soaked. I did briefly get caught in it on my way back from my party of one Chipotle dinner.  

It's oddly quite across the street from me - the NYU dorm is still closed for summer renovations. I think I have a month or so left until I can spy in on the neatly arranged dorm cubes to see pj-clad students hiding behind their laptops. It seems every other window is aglow with cool blue artificial screening light from their brand new MacBook Pro's. I stare out a lot here in my apartment, like an old lady waiting for her son to come visit her. You know the one that never comes. I know relatively no one here. I have no job yet which is slowly draining the life out of me, I am sure Paul hates it too. It amazes me that in a city this big one can be virtually alone. Being alone fucks with you in ways I have never had to deal with. The upside is the dog gets lots (probably too much) attention. My legs are toned from all the walking I do and for the most part the apartment looks good. Not polished, not home but good to to visitors.

So onto the cliché. I was listening to This American Life's segments on Dad's. I only listened to half but it was a good half. *I love that podcast and I give Paul all the credit for introducing me to it. The subject of dad is an interesting one to me. To the outside world it may appear that I am lucky for I have two dads - a step dad and a "real" dad. The interesting thing is I am not all that close to either of them. They know all about me, my life, what I am doing, etc but we do not share a father-son relationship. So the segment I listened to was told by a guy whose dad died when he was 12. It was sad and hit me hard to the point where I almost started to cry at the point when the mom has to tell the kids their dad died. Sad right? However I had to suck it in for I was eating at the Chipotle by my house and crying there would be awkward for everyone. I thought about the sadness and of course I thought of my mom and the sadness not just around her death but around our future. By our I mean myself, my husband, our marriage, my sister, her kids, her husband, my stepdad and also the rest of our extended family.

So here I am in Chipotle, the weather outside is building, my mood is tanking and I still have half the burrito bowl to eat before I can leave. Young girls occupying the table adjacent from me laugh hysterically, having the time of their lives I suppose. This laughter annoys me and I realize after a minute of thinking "Shut up. STFU!" that their laughter makes me sad. It makes me realize that I am (other than my husband and dog) alone in this city. I am without friends, without family and while its on my mind without my mom. The ladder part of that statement bothers me. I hate that grief still can grip me after two and half years of losing someone. I guess the combo of the podcast, the loneliness and the weather caught up to me.

Well the weather has lifted and oddly so has my mood. I guess it's true that sometimes writing out what you feel can actually help. So tomorrow I won't be cliché (the cliché being sad while it rains) when I check in.

Be well.

Well hello there

It has been over a year since I visited this blog. Shows how fickle I can be I suppose.

Anyway lets begin

I find myself in new territory - new as in New York City. Its been 6 weeks since my arrival. So far not much has happened. Hopefully my lack of happening will push me into writing here more. Hey I may even invite some people to check me out. So far it's just me and my wondering vision of what to do with this. With my time here. With my life is more like it.

So keeping my chin up I will try to document things I see around these them there parts and let "you", whoever you are, know what I find interesting.

Stay tuned. I promise not to be gone long.